Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Life changes when you give up expecting


The overwhelming majority of people live trapped between the past and the future, so they let the present escape from them. Many believe that when they get the desired promotion they will be happier, that when they find a partner they will finally be complete, that when they are retired they will be able to do what they want...

This way they live accumulating expectations for the future. They stop thinking about how to improve their current situation and imagine living in tomorrow. They focus on how they should live or how they would like to live, not realizing that they are just staking a claim on the present. Consequently, when they speak, the conversation is a constant complaint that includes all the misfortunes and frustrations of their daily lives.

Therefore, expecting something from the future by forgetting the present becomes a rope with which hands and feet are tied. So, if we want our lives to change, the first step, which is also the hardest to do, is to stop waiting.

What should you stop waiting for?

- Stop waiting for something from the others. Even though people around you love you and consider you, they have their own needs, dreams and illusions, so you can’t expect them to always meet your expectations. In fact, when you free them from the yoke of expectation, you also free yourself. When you do not claim anything, what you are given will grow spontaneously and you will learn to appreciate it more. Also, do not expect too much from the others, learn to trust yourself and feel much safer.

- Stop waiting for everything to be perfect. If you expect the conditions to be perfect to make the big step and make the decision, you're likely to stay where you are. The perfect moment does not exist, it is often a creation of the fear that is obsessing our mind. When we are afraid or we are in danger, we console ourselves with the idea that conditions are not the most favorable. Of course, it's not about launching in the vacuum without a parachute, but if there's something you really want, do not wait, go ahead and take the first steps. Stop waiting for the perfect moment and get yourself to work creates an incredible feeling of power and makes you notice that the true architect of your life is you.

- Stop pretending too much from yourself. Often, the expectations that we carry on our shoulders crush us. The curious thing is that they often tend to be the expectations our parents and adults had on us, so maybe it's time to get rid of them. It's okay to plan new challenges and goals, but if they get you a lot of tension, to the point of damaging your well-being, maybe you're pretending too much from yourself. Living every day making sure you enjoy it reduces the stress and, curiously, just when you free your expectations, you reach the maximum potential because you feel much freer to do what you have always wanted and dreamed of. Remember that you are a unique and extraordinary person, you do not need to adapt to the expectations of others.

- Stop waiting too much from the future. Living in the future means getting away from the present, which is where your life takes place. Begin to love what you are and feel satisfied with this. This does not mean that you do not have to work to improve and achieve other goals, but if you feel already happy, the way to your new goals will be much more enjoyable because you know that your happiness does not depend solely on these. We can’t know what the future holds for us, but we know what we have in the present, make sure you get the most out of it and be grateful for all the little things in life.

What changes do you make when you stop waiting?

- Take control of your life, you are aware that your decisions, actions, and attitudes have consequences and determine your path.

- Begin to take small steps that will take you in the right direction instead of being stuck in a vicious circle of complaints.

- You get rid of a huge weight, because you get rid of all the expectations that have been a brake on your development.

- You realize that although you can get more things and have other goals, you can feel grateful for what you are and you have.

- You stop to feel frustrated because you do not have so many expectations, stops will be less tough. You will also learn to value more the unexpected gifts.

- You will begin to flow with the changes that are happening around you, which means that you are in tune with the world and you can better use the opportunities that this offers you.

In any case, do not expect to have everything to enjoy life, you already have life to enjoy everything.


Keep feeding your neurons

Life changes when you give up expecting
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Jennifer Delgado Suárez

Psicologist by profession and passion, dedicated to to string words together. Discover my Books


Psychology as you never heard about...

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