Friday, February 12, 2016

When we stop thinking about what could happen we begin enjoying what happens

future and past

When we are kids we live in the “here and now”. However, as we grow we begin worrying about the future. And little by little, almost without realizing it, these concerns take over our minds, so much to prevent us from living fully the present.

In fact, the society encourages and rewards that kind of thinking. And people around us encourage us to develop this thinking with words like “you must think about your future” and “you’d better be saving for tomorrow”.

Obviously, there’s nothing wrong with thinking of the future and looking ahead before making an important decision. Indeed, it’s good thinking that way, but in the right perspective. The problem begins when the fear of the future ties the present.

How do you know if you are living in the future?

There are some signs that show we’re not living in the present, that our mind is in the future, inventing problems that do not exist. This is when:

- You worry constantly about problems that have not yet occurred

- You exaggerate the consequences of your actions, so much so that these become a real drama

- You’re anxious for situations that may never occur and relive them over and over again in your mind

- You live in a constant state of anticipation, waiting for something bad to happen

- You don’t make decisions because you expect a “sign from the future”, something that creates a great tension and stress

- You think you will only be happy when you’ll realize the goal you proposed yourself

- You feel miserable but do nothing for it because you secretly hope that in the future everything will be fixed as if by magic

The future is uncertain, accept it

People living in the future have a serious problem: they are not able to accept uncertainty. The impossibility of knowing for sure what will happen haunts them, so they try to trim any hypothesis to help them be prepared for what might happen.

However, the truth is that the future is uncertain. And the sooner you accept it, the better is. Every little decision we make can lead us in one direction or another. And it’s not always up to us.

Embracing uncertainty, assume it as a surprise or a challenge, will allow us free ourselves from the anxiety that often leads to the unknown, and helps us living fully the here and now.

Of course, it doesn’t mean we have to stop thinking about the future because we will always have plans to realize and we have to think about the possible consequences of our decisions, but we have to to learn to deal with this perspective assuming a more relaxed attitude. It’s about learning to flow and rely more on the lifetime.

The greatest reward: The present

When we unleashed ourselves from the shackles of the future we get a great reward: the present. We feel free to fully enjoy the here and now. Then we can look around us and see clearly those things that anxiety and fear prevented us from noticing before.

Remember that the present is all we have to change the future, therefore, it is our most precious possession. Our duty is to take profit of every minute, because we will not have a second chance.

Live today hoping there will be a tomorrow, but don’t forget that this moment won’t be repeated.


Keep feeding your neurons

When we stop thinking about what could happen we begin enjoying what happens
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Jennifer Delgado Suárez

Psicologist by profession and passion, dedicated to to string words together. Discover my Books


Psychology as you never heard about...

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