Monday, July 20, 2015

10 truths about life that we forget every day



It is surprising how easily we forget the things which are really important in life. A busy daily life is the best way to lose perspective, to drown into the routine and begin to run on autopilot forgetting the fundamentals. Therefore, there are truths that we should repeat ourselves over and over, like a mantra. These are the truths to help us stay focused on our goals and achieve greater emotional balance along the way.

1. Being busy is not the same as being productive

Just look around. Most of the people around us seem very busy, running from one place to another, attending meetings and answering emails and messages, dozens of them. But are they really producing something?

Indeed, productivity and success doesn’t always come from movement and activity, but the concentration and focus. In fact, very often the day escapes us through dozens of tasks that aren’t so important and do not respond to our life goals.

However, as every day we have the same number of hours at our disposal and we can do absolutely nothing to increase them, the better is to use them wisely. Therefore, make sure that your efforts will bear results, that you spend your time not only keeping you busy but also being productive and, above all, to get closer and closer to the goals that really matter.

2. Fear is the main cause of regret

Fear is often a silent enemy that slips through small loopholes and gradually begins to grow. In fact, fear prevents us to take steps toward our dreams and keeps us tied to a reality we don’t like.

Throughout life we ​​experience three main fears: 1. Fear to leave our comfort zone where we feel safe (not comfortable or satisfied), 2. Fear of losing people we love and, 3. Fear of failure.

These fears are not always clearly expressed, in fact, many times we are not fully aware they keeps us from changing. However, they become our main obstacle in achieving our dreams and when we reach the end of the road, are the cause of our major regrets. Remember that there’s nothing worse than asking ourselves: "What would have happened if I had dared?"

3. You don’t need an apology to forgive

Life goes more smoothly when we let go the resentment and forgive. When we keep the resentment that caused pain in the past, we're just ruining our present. Hatred and anger are like pests that destroy our emotional happiness and affect our psychological balance.

Negative emotions that arise as a result of feeding the resentment generate a great deal of stress, which also has devastating consequences on our health. Therefore, one of the most important lessons we can implement is forgiveness.

Remember that you don’t need to hear an apology from the person who has wronged you to forgive and move on. Because when you feed the resentment you are doing more damage to yourself. When you forgive someone, it doesn’t mean you condone his actions, but simply that you free yourself from the role of victim.

4. The greatest success are often preceded by failures

You will not experience success until you learn to embrace failure. Errors are like tiles on the road to success. In fact, every time you make a mistake, you're closer to success because at least you know the strategies that aren’t working.

Think that the greatest discoveries often come after several failures. In those moments we’re frustrated and frustration leads us to think differently, makes us think outside the box and see solutions that we overlooked.

Success doesn’t happen overnight, it demands a lot of patience and the ability to stay motivated along the way.

5. You’re living the life you've created

We are not victims of circumstance. Nobody forced us to make choices that lead us down a path that goes in the opposite direction of our values ​​and aspirations. According to the Butterfly Effect, we are the result of small decisions we have been taking over time.

Therefore, the circumstances we are living today, in some way, have been created by ourselves. This means it is necessary to shed the role of victim and take charge of our lives because the future depends on us alone.

If you're stuck or you lost an opportunity, it is likely due to fear of facing new risks. Therefore, every time you make a decision, remember that, no matter how small, is a brick more on the wall of your life.

6. Self-esteem must be fed from the inside

When the satisfaction we feel with our performance depends directly on the outcome of the comparisons we make with others, we quit being owners of our destiny. When we let others handle our self-esteem and how we feel, we give them the reins of our lives.

It’s true that it is impossible to break away completely from the reactions and opinions of others, but we don’t need to compare constantly to ratify our worth. When you feel good about something you've done, don’t let the opinions of others quit you that feeling.

At one point in life, self-esteem is something that we must feed from within. This means we must learn to understand the valuations of others as mere opinions, not as immutable truths that directly affect our self-esteem.

7. You’re a reflection of the people with whom you relate

We can’t always choose the people around us, but we can decide who become part of our inner circle, those people to share our time with. Therefore, try to surround yourself with people that are worthwhile, that are positive and inspiring, who share your vision of the world and be a support not an obstacle.

If you surround yourself with toxic people, in the best case, you will end up completely unmotivated. In the worst case, you'll end up imitating their ways of relating. You don’t need at your side people who make you feel inferior, who transmit anxiety, fear and despair. Life is too short to let such people steal our energy and zest for life.

Remember that, like it or not, people around us end up influencing our world view, attitudes and decisions, so it is important to surround yourself with people which are inspiring you.

8. Change is inevitable, embrace it

We love what is familiar, because in our minds represents stability and security. For this reason we usually have a resistance to change. However, if there’s anything certain in life, is that changes are inevitable, so it is essential to learn to deal with them with as little stress as possible.

In fact, once we change our attitude, we start seeing changes as learning opportunities, so they cease to be so frightening and opens before us a new world of possibilities, a world we had not seen before.

In fact, think that doing the same things but expecting different results is quietly insane. Learn to enjoy the changes and make the best of them. Embracing uncertainty is one of the most important and useful lessons of life.

9. Life is unfair, learn to deal with it

Expecting life to be fair is like thinking that a hungry lion won’t eat us just because we are vegetarians. However, we often forget it and we complain because life is too unfair.

Anyway, mourning over spilled milk it involves a huge waste of time and energy. Thinking about how things should be is usually an exit strategy to an ideal world that only exists in our minds, while we’re rejecting the real problems.

Life is unfair, unfortunately, bad things happen to good people. There’s not much we can do except help. However, to help and really change things, we must learn to see them as they are, unveiled. Only when we focus on the problem we can solve it.

10. Live the present, because that's all you have

We can’t develop our full potential until we have not learned to live in the present. No matter how you experience guilt, you can’t change the past. And no matter how much anxiety you feel, it won’t help you to improve the future. However, the truth is that you can’t be happy and productive experiencing those emotions.

No one can guarantee to you that there will be a tomorrow, so make the most of the present, because it's all you have. The past is over and the future doesn’t exist yet. Remember that worrying is as prepaying an high debt before you know if you’ll never contract it.

Remember that life is too short, take profit of every minute and make it worthwhile.

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10 truths about life that we forget every day
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Jennifer Delgado Suárez

Psicologist by profession and passion, dedicated to to string words together. Discover my Books

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1 comments so far

It is the human nature or we can say that a psychology fact, that we forget everything easily in our life. most probably this is due to busy schedule and stress, that we are unable to remember things. I never study psychology, but while following this article I can say that due to fear, stress, depression, and frustration, we are suffering a lot and this will put a huge impact in our life. So, we need to take positive steps as well as think positive things to develop our personal lifestyle. I would like to follow the ingredients present here on life changes and truth of life. Thanks for highlighting these points.
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